After many years working in reproductive medicine, I’ve had the privilege of supporting countless individuals through the journey of IVF. Patients that integrate Traditional Chinese Medicine into their fertility journey find that we become more than practitioners. We become guides, listeners, and emotional lifelines. Yes, acupuncture can help increase response to stimulation meds and lessen side effects. But more often than not, our patients need emotional support and guidance.
Here is one piece of advice I always share with my patients:
Stay off the internet.
I know—ironic advice, as this is being read ON THE INTERNET. But time and time again, I’ve watched patients fall down the rabbit hole, searching for answers:
“Am I going to be okay?”
“How will this end for me?”
The problem is the internet can’t answer those questions. It’s not a crystal ball.
Yes, there are helpful parts of the web—YouTube tutorials on how to mix medications, forums where women swap tips, stories that might make someone feel a little less alone. But for every helpful post, there are ten more that spark anxiety, confusion, and despair.
The truth is, IVF comes with a huge emotional toll. One of the hardest parts is surrendering to the unknown. The process itself demands a release of control, and the internet—while tempting—often tricks us into thinking we can regain some of it. But scrolling isn’t control. It’s just more noise.
So instead of endlessly researching, here are other suggestion:
Find a fabulous book of fiction.
Let your mind rest in another world. Escape for a little while. Let go of the pressure to “figure it all out.” And remember—you are not alone. There is a whole team of us behind you. You don’t need a crystal ball. You need support, space to breathe, and the reminder that your story is yours alone.
Focus on what is good, right now.
Examine your life and find the things that are “good”. Your relationships? Work? Hobbies? These are seemingly small, inconsequential aspects of daily life but find gratitude for the aspects of your life that make it worth living.
Make plans for the future.
Specifically, plan that trip. Go to that wedding out of state. RSVP yes for the birthday party. So often life revolves around the questions “will I be pregnant then?” or “will I be in treatment at that time?” These questions hold us back from being able to enjoy life, which should NOT be a sacrifice during this difficult time.
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